Pouria didn’t write an intro, so I get to. I don’t know how he found 30 actual new release albums to review among the few records that trickle out each year between Thanksgiving and Christmas, but he is an adventurous type. Read on to see his thoughts on many bands I didn’t even know existed.
Untitled by R Kelly –While listening to the album I forgot I was supposed to be reviewing it. This is a result of it being great. There is also a song about getting you preggers, so you know, awesome.
Cocky And Confident by Juvenile – Guess I’m in a hip-hop kinda mood today. Pretty good album with body moving beats. I don’t hold any grudges or opinions about Juvenile, so this album is good.
Stir The Blood by The Bravery – I felt I was going to hurl during the first track, it made me really dizzy. Too much new wave vocals for me. I don’t have pants skinny or tight enough for this album. Although to be fair it gets more listenable as the album goes on.
Just Like You by Allison Iraheta – I am cranky without my lunch, so far texting has been mentioned 3 times. Her voice has been different in each song. I mean, it’s an American Idol album. Production is well funded but so boring.
Jukebox by Priscilla Renea – I don’t know, a really short pop album. Whatever.
Ineffable Mysteries From Shpongleland by Shpongle – Pretty cool okay? So what? It appeals to my Middle Eastern sensibilities in a big way. Sue me. You know what else? I won’t be embarrassed because this album rules. It makes me want to dust-off my hookah, hang up my Iranian flag, and open a kabob shop.
Numbers by Stellastarr* – A 2 song EP. Even with two songs, well gee, this EP fucking rules. It would be interesting if their full-length is as good as this lonely couple.
Fate Unfolds by Tristeza – Indie-rock-jam-album. It’s real good to listen to at work.
Montezuma’s Revenge by Souls of Mischief – Oakland natives Souls of Mischief haven’t put out an album together in nine years. It’s a ho-hum album.
Graphic As A Star by Josephine Foster – Sounds a bit like Jolie Holland. If you know who that is then you will probably like this album. Something to fall asleep to.
El Principe by Cosculluela – Guess it serves someone’s interests to listen to this.
All I Do EP by MJG – Man this is an awesome EP. Rap from Memphis is pretty sweet. Like it’s not revolutionary or high-brow, it’s just hard not to bounce to.
American Nigga EP by 8Ball – So nice that MJG and 8Ball have solo EP’s on the same day. The first four tracks of this EP are the same annoying song. “Get This Money” is the best track on this album.
The Long Way Home by The Skip Heller Trio – This is for those people who get together at pizza parlors and make comments at the Flat Screen while the OSU and Oregon is on. Their children are next to them asking about the rivalries and they are pretending to be into the game and into their family. All they want to do though is go and drink a bottle of bourbon and listen to better music. But charades must be kept up for their entire life.
Expatriate by The Coast – Gets good at Track 6. The first half of the album is kind of a let down.
Exodus by Exodus – At times like Final Fantasy and others like Night at the Roxbury.
Hustla on Demand by Freestyle – Sounds like if one of my high school buddies had decided to make a rap album in high school. One song goes on to explain what a butter head is, as if we need an explanation.
Ecstasy & Friends by Lone – Some sort of pressurizing effect going on with my ears right now, super uncomfortable.
Needs A Little Water by Damion Suomi – A little folky and bluegrassy. Mostly mediocre.
Frauhaus! by Wetdog – Another mediocre album. Punky cutesy stuff. Some of the lyrics are nonsense, but that’s okay as it is cute.
Shadows and Shapes by Adam Howard – I mean he sounds pretty sincere…but to me it sounds like a Damien Rice/Ben Folds remix.
Up On The Moon by Target Market – Sounds like a young band trying to make an adult noise. It’s heart-warming, like you want to like it. Maybe these guys are seasoned but it sounds dated to me.
Antidote EP by Virus Syndicate – Oh, my. Have you missed that one song where that dude states how much he loves to move it move it? Do you love British hip-hop? Have you always wanted to hear that move-it song with British hip-hop?
Love Is the Answer by The Icarus Account – I imagine these guys are naturally hairless and have never changed the oil of their automobiles.
The Hustle, The Prayer, The Thief by A Night In The Box – Starts off like it has potential. Hard driving electro bluegrass, I likey. Almost like Devil Makes Three and White Stripes.
December Somewhere by Ecce – At first I was like this is amateur hour but the first track grew on me as did the second. There is something to be said for this music, almost like electronic-shoegaze. I dig.
Destroy Us by Sennen – This one is actual shoegaze. I like it. Partly split between vocals and instrumentals, short enough to not get boring, and the instrumentals do that build up thing that I know the noun for but won’t use because I don’t want to be pretentious.
Daniel, Fred & Julie by Daniel, Fred & Julie – Supposedly no edits or overdubs in this album, recorded in a garage. It sounds warm and inviting. Folk music that I would listen to on my porch after a particularly significant evening, possibly after meeting an old lover or a world-turning revelation in the family, taking long pulls from the whiskey I found in the back of the liquor cabinet and staring into the night.
Everything Changes and Nothing Changes by Dave Smallen – Meh. Like a Glen Phillips or something. Piano and angst.
Teenage Kicks by Teenage Kicks – Nope, not The Undertones. These guys are a punk band though that are fun to listen to . Slightly grating vocals and cool lyrics backed up with surprisingly good music.