No, that’s not an unhoused person. It’s Janeane Garafolo! A clan of the cave bear silhouette, Janeane shuffled out from the side stage with self-proclaimed “unsolicited dreads” and control top tights & shorts. Two separate nude concealing undergarments, mind you. She claims that when she got hit by a car, Spanks™ saved her from going to the hospital. Which she just won’t do anyway. She claims to be a “Pedo~file:” she walks everywhere, hates working on her core, and refuses checkups and physicals.
In true “Eileen Fisher fashion,” she is a 58-year-old goddess and 90’s icon. Still pacing and walking swiftly in might as well be wearing a turquoise and magenta polyester jog suit mode. But does so in her loose khaki cargo pants with no belt and a “Live Pink” cap-sleeve girl tee. Spanks™ on lock. Doc Martens are highly visible.
She lives on Cheezits and all-natural cigs. Has a partner, Pete, of 26 years in NYC, and waxes bittersweetly about their cohabitation issues. Sounds like Janeane likes to go down to the cardboard recycling area of their apartment and break down boxes for other families that aren’t doing it right. She lives with a person with many piles that she cleans up. “It takes two to dynamic,” she says. She shifts the bad boundaries she has with her partner to her neighborly dynamics, but not without her own little personal reward of crushing on a handyman. She mentions how her partner will offer to do a “Big Clean” and how that just disrupts the household further. Because everything just ends up in piles. She is “risk adverse.”
She claims she’s the filibuster of comedy. Can just keeeeeep going. She’s not Jewish and she’s not a mom. Both are strong misconceptions she gets on a regular basis. She was only thought to be homeless three times this year, and her hair isn’t even as bad as it gets, she reminded us. A tiny gap of silver clung to the tousled shape her hair kept. Her angled elbow clutched the microphone stand, and she swayed from it, filibustering away. “There was no empowerment when I was growing up…We still had smoking lounges in high school.” She gives out adoration to Tig Navarro and reminds us that if you are playing the game of plastic surgery, to hold at 17 in that game of 21. She’s adorable and random and anyhoozle………….
